What is Resilience

I talk with people who are on their second round of extreme Lyme treatments.  I see such a pain  and resignation on their faces and wonder, “How can they summon up that courage to fight one more time.”  Could I?

I got Bartonella a few weeks ago.  I was and am Lyme free.  This was just Bartonella, a co-infection.  I got a bug bite on the back of my neck and a few days later I began to have “ice pick” headaches, aching on the soles of my feet and my lymph nodes were swelling up at the base of my skull.  the fatigue was there, but not the  deep and deadly “Lyme fatigue”  Over a few days, most of the lymph nodes in my neck, underarms and chest had begun to swell and Bartonella was confirmed by my Lyme Doctor.

I have a “Lyme med” box and quickly began my Azithromax and Doxycycline.  My fear was intense.  What’s with the Bart?  Apparently it comes in with many bug bites.  85% of the people bit with a Bartonella infected bug do not get the infection.  Those of of with dormant Lyme and compromised immune systems are a different story.  The infected ticks or insects send out a pheromone and call up any dormant virus.  Like a siren signaling to the lusting sailors.  “Come out and play my dear ones!”  It is a frightening concept for those of us with  compromised immune system.

So, what happened with my Bartonella?  I quickly began my deep visualization and meditation that had served me so well when I was rid of the last vestiges of Lyme and Babesia.   I performed another ceremony ( I have  not yet talked about that) and that day, my bart signs receded and in 3 days my Lymph nodes were normal.  I did not take any more antibiotics after I performed my ceremony and deep meditation.

So, I am now aware of how vulnerable I am to reinfection.  That means that something inside of me must shift.  I must become more resilient.  People with cancer are able to change their bodies on a cellular level.  Candace Pert, Bruce Lipton and many others are no doing the science to prove that we in fact can make this happen.   I was able to to make that shift.  The first time it was with a group of people who supported me.  This last time, I did it alone.  It is empowering and at the same time very humbling.   I have a deep respect for the resilience and wisdom of my body.  I am its caretaker and I feel honored to be on a path in which new ways of healing and spiritual growth are becoming evident in my daily life.

We have been given this epidemic of Lyme and all its co-infections.  What is needed now is a way to partner with it.  We heal with our meds and lifestyle changes.   We  then must do the dance of inner healing.  It is this dance that has now become the alchemy of my existence.

And so I begin

I am beginning this Blog to make sense of my journey into the world of Lyme Disease.  Lyme.  A  4  letter word.  A  4  letter word that describes a life journey.  A new beginning and an opening into a life of peace, surrender and learning how to surf the boundaries of death and new life.

I am, at the moment in “Lyme remission.”  I thought you were cured of Lyme once you had done the due diligence of  going to the ends of all you could endure and making it back to a place of health and new found energy.   Imagine my dismay when I realized that the “cure” was contingent on the maintenance of my daily spiritual program and healthy diet and lifestyle.  Remarkably like the 12 steps of AA.

To heal from Lyme takes courage, cash and steely patience.  It takes a strong will to live.

To STAY healed from Lyme is the part I am trying to figure out.

I had a most interesting  healing from Lyme and co-infections.  It involved a Native American ceremony, Friends and a deep reverence and trust in the process.  It came at a point where I felt that I was almost finished with my Lyme and Babesia.  It was profound.

So here I am without Lyme.  I do not have that deep and bone sucking fatigue.  Here is my life and how am I to live it?   In the past, my life was always lived at warp speed.  Always going and doing like the energizer bunny, until I dropped.  I had no regulator.  No gray area.  For 3 years I lost that.  I felt as though I had lost my essence.  In fact, I found it.

What I discovered was a deep sense of peace.  It was in this place that I could hear my heart.  I could feel the deep soul rhythm that had been calling me.  I slowed down enough to find a spiritual and artistic place.  I awoke to who I really was.

I am beginning this Blog to make sense of my journey into the world of Lyme Disease.  Lyme.  A  4  letter word.  A  4  letter word that describes a life journey.  A new beginning and an opening into a life of peace, surrender and learning how to surf the boundaries of death and new life.

I am, at the moment in “Lyme remission.”  I thought you were cured of Lyme once you had done the due diligence of  going to the ends of all you could endure and making it back to a place of health and new found energy.   Imagine my dismay when I realized that the “cure” was contingent on the maintenance of my daily spiritual program and healthy diet and lifestyle.  Remarkably like the 12 steps of AA.

To heal from Lyme takes courage, cash and steely patience.  It takes a strong will to live.

To STAY healed from Lyme is the part I am trying to figure out.

I had a most interesting  healing from Lyme and co-infections.  It involved a Native American ceremony, Friends and a deep reverence and trust in the process.  It came at a point where I felt that I was almost finished with my Lyme and Babesia.  It was profound.

So here I am without Lyme.  I do not have that deep and bone sucking fatigue.  Here is my life and how am I to live it?   In the past, my life was always lived at warp speed.  Always going and doing like the energizer bunny, until I dropped.  I had no regulator.  No gray area.  For 3 years I lost that.  I felt as though I had lost my essence.  In fact, I found it.

What I discovered was a deep sense of peace.  It was in this place that I could hear my heart.  I could feel the deep soul rhythm that had been calling me.  I slowed down enough to find a spiritual and artistic place.  I awoke to who I really was.